Monday, April 16, 2007

How to be ah Lian/ah Beng

Ah Lian

The hair: Straight is good.RMbr to go
for regular rebonding sessions to ensure
ur hair looks "chio".Increase ur
kawaii(cute) factor by addking all sorts
of rainbow colored clips to ur hair.



THe make up: The more the merrier, pile
on the foundation and candy pink blush.
Put on some bright red lipstick & maybe
some blue or green eye shadow to dazzle
ur beau.

The handphone: With this multi-purpose
accessory that doubles as a mirror,use
it to take pictures of ur beloved to use
as ur wallpaper. SMs ur friends to
gossip about who's dating who and hang
those dangling hello kitty phone straps
for deco. Take pictures of yourself doing

Sexy posses 360 posses is the best

THe Clothes: The weirder the
better.Contrast is good. Make sure the
colors clash. THat's how u stand out.
The shorter the skirt or shorts, the
better-flaunt ur legs, skinny or flabby.
Make sure ur tops have enough frills or
lace to look "dainty".Let the straps of
ur black bra peek out,it's said to be
fashionable.


The handbag: Has to be "Blanded". Don't
care if it's fake or genuine-must have
the "G" or "LV" logo. Carry it with
pride even though it's far from the real
thang.

The shoes: Make that 3 inches,no why not
5 inches? GEt urself a pair of platform
shoes guaranteed to add height to ur
stature and make u feel tall.THese
chunky shoes come in all different
designs and colors.Take ur pick

Favourite sentence: "Wah L@n Neh" & you
want fight ah??"

Ah Beng
The HAir: Ah Beng's crowning glory
calls for regular maintenance. A regular
dye job is paramount-go for golds, reds
or blue if you want. Try to keep a long
fringe (below eye level)-it's very
useful to flip when trying to look cool
or u can go for the "act cute" look by
accessorizing with a hair band ..

try and make a half dyed hair (maybe purple and Gold ..Zhing la)

The accessories: to complete ur look,
get some gold or silver chains,
fisherman slippers & a cool tattoo on ur
arm. Fake ones won't do.

remember the chain is super Long try not to drag it enough

Th handphones: Make ur own collection of
interchangeable hp covers 2 match ur
hair color.to look impressive, squat
while using hp,using vulgarity."Wah Lan
Neh!!VEry the ah beng hor!"

make sure u can take picture of your self

do the 180 degree pose with one eye covered by your hair

The car: One word-modified. Ah Beng cars
are designed to siam(escape) as fast as
possible frm the police bt gain the
greatest amount of attn while doin so.To
have ur car looking real "swee"(pretty),
choose an outstanding color like white
or red, fit with modified bumpers &neon
speed meters. Install a flashing antenna
tat can flash lights that;s playin on ur
super loud stereo system.

The clothing: Save money to buy
"blanded" clothing from Armani. Or else,
stock up clothing in every fluorescent
color u can find, especially if they;re
tight &have dragon printed on them,If u
want more pattern,try sleeveless shirts
w zips in front so u can pull the zip
down to create different effects

FAvourite sentence: "wah lao eh, why u
so chao ah beng one?"(Goodness, why are
u such an ah beng?)

2 Comments:

Blogger Sodapickles said...

Lol. I know where you got that from!! RIPOFF. :p

3:39 PM  
Blogger Nicholas said...

LOL.... Oh man... u got me right there..

11:04 PM  

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